Ron Swanson (Parks and Recreation) is my fictional character role model.
Ron Swanson Quotes
"I think the entire government should be privatized. Chuck E. Cheese could run the parks. Everything operated by tokens. Drop in a token, go on the swing set. Drop in another token, take a walk. Drop in a token, look at a duck."
"Strippers do nothing for me. I like a strong, salt of the Earth, self-possessed woman at the top of her field. Your Steffi Grafs, your Sheryl Swoopeses, but I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace."
"The whole point of this country is if you want to eat garbage, balloon up to 600 pounds and die of a heart attack at 43, you can! You are free to do so. To me, that's beautiful."
"What exactly will you be cutting? And how much of it, and can I watch you do it while eating pork cracklings?"
"I'm an official member of a task force dedicated to slashing the city budget. Just saying that gave me a semi."
"Right off the bat, we sell city hall. Let somebody turn it into a large gas station or a TJ Maxx"
"Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into Swansons."
"Well, I am not usually one for speeches. So, goodbye"
"The less I know about other people's affairs, the happier I am. I'm not interested in caring about people. I once worked with a guy for three years and never learned his name. Best friend I ever had. We still never talk sometimes."